To the love of my life
This is my very first letter to Mg responding his love for me. Unlike that many people would have written in their first love letters, mine is pretty depressing. Since at the very beginning, I knew we did have a long way to go to the point we could settle down and start a together life. Instead of pouring love and all sweet words in it, my letter is full of my concerns for our relationship (which we had not even started it yet). Nevertheless, it does show my seriousness in the relationship we were about to start. I was just reluctant to get myself in a relationship b’coz I knew myself well, if I get in, I will make it work as perfect as possible with all my heart and energy, but, at that time, I was still very young with full of dreams and energy for my own life ahead. I was so afraid of I would have to come out with a broken heart – disturbing other things I had to do in my life if a relationship did not work out. Neither did I want that the other one felt hurt – if that did not work out just because I put less seriousness.
Even though I knew he was the one I wanted to spend my whole life with, I was nervous for my decision. Instead of a verbal answer, I wrote it down to give it to him in person. At that time, I did not feel that comfort and clarity in this whole thing yet to be able to express it clearly in my own language.
Once after Mg read the letter, he also noticed my concerns. He gently turned me around to face him and held my face in his both hands, and assured me again that I could take his words seriously. When we walked on to a nearby bench, he held my hand for the first time and told me in a very low, but firm voice, “From now on, hand in hand – forever,” which the title of this blog is inspired.
This is the letter, later, mg often joked me, I was too concerned not to make a mistake in the decision to notice I had made many grammar and spelling mistakes in the letter. Some sentences just does not make sense. Anyway, I could not care less about it as the whole thing does make sense at the end. 😀